We’re back again! With a show that was recorded a week before the Oscars, and now is being posted almost a month after the Oscars, and somehow manages to spend more time on Michael Bay’s Benghazi movie than any individual Oscar film! We’re nothing if not relevant! We’re nothing if not timely!
We’re nothing. 🙁
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Hey! Guess what guess what guess what guesswhat guesswhat guesswhatguesswhat guesswhatguesswhatguesswhat guesswhatguesswhatguesswhat?? WE RECORDED A PODCAST AND IT DIDN’T SUCK! ALSO I’M CRACKED OUT OF MY SKULL ON LACK OF SLEEP AND CAFFEINE AND CRYING BABIES AND I’M NOT SCREAMING YOU’RE SCREAMING FUCK YOUUUUU
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While I’d like to believe that this is the start of a new era of podcasting, I’ve got 13 months of data that shows that’s probably not the case. That said! We’re sort of back! And we haven’t gotten any better at this, but hey, very few things get better after you do them 63 times. But add another 6 times and hey, that’s a whole new ballgame.
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It’s gotta be at least a little weird to be the kid from Boyhood. I mean, I had a camera following me around for most of my teen years, but those VHS tapes are locked safely away in a basement in the Midwest. And even I get a little itchy sometimes, wondering if they’ll get unearthed, and people will see the walking haystack of bad Cobain hair and leaking acne and I’ll lose all the credibility that I’ve gained over the years as a film critic. Or, alternately, we could just do another episode, and let my talking do that by itself.
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HA! You didn’t think we’d get in our fourth episode of the year, did you?!?! WELL THE JOKE’S ON YOU SWEETHEART BECAUSE HERE IT IS.
Wait, did we really only do four episodes? What the hell are they paying us for?
Wait, they’re not paying us?
Wait, who’s “they,” anyway? Is it us? Are we they? Or is they us? Or am we them?
SPOILER ALERT: IT’S ACTUALLY MATTHEW MCCONAUGHEY
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